Casting our own shadows

My sons were but young boys when, as a captain, I started to enjoy the amenities  of a "senior" officer having just been designated as the Secretary to the Area Command Staff of the Visayas Command, Armed Forces of the Philippines.  One of these amenities, not normally accorded to other officers of the same rank or even higher, was a “staff car”.  Actually, it was just a Kennedy type jeep but in those days, it was already a big thing.  We had very few vehicles then and only the top three people in the organization and the principal staff had them

With my new assignment, my children now get the privilege of riding on a motor vehicle.  They love to ride that jeep each time they are in camp for their regular visits.  It made them feel great because back home, riding with their grandfather on his old bicycle was the most that they could get. Each time that my sons join me in my “staff car”, they would insist to sit with me in the front.  It is not only more comfortable there but the boys had other reasons why they prefer that seat.  They were fascinated with what they can see from that vantage position.  They wanted to observe closely the routine type of military courtesy that I get – the military salute. 

It is customary that when a soldier salutes a senior officer, the latter has to acknowledge it by also rendering a similar courtesy.  (Although in some cases when it is impractical or inconvenient to return the salute, a simple nod may do.)  My sons would then imagine that they were the ones being saluted at.  Hence, whoever amongst them was the first one to get my cap and wear it; he would have the privilege of acknowledging the soldier with the snappiest salute that he could muster with his infirm hand.  Being saluted and saluting the soldiers back never fail to make my boys beam with pride.

Children always get to enjoy the extension of the privileges, the amenities and the esteem that were meant for their parents by virtue of their positions in their respective organizations or spheres of influence.   While roaming inside camp, my kids were always treated nicely or given preferential attention by the soldiers even if sometimes they become mischievous or even discourteous.  Often, they receive small gifts or get invited to partake of meals or snacks by “strangers” whom they learn later on were my friends. 

As my children grew older, I gradually explained to them the phenomenon of reflected friendship, respect and esteem that they get from my friends.  I told them that these things are not forever.  A time will come that they will have to stand by themselves and cast their own shadows.  Later, people will treat and interact with them based on their own merits and not on the status or the accomplishments of their parents.

I have two (2) sons that followed my footsteps as a soldier.  When they were young, they were simply known as the sons of Captain Cabales (later on as the sons of Major then Colonel Cabales, as I rose up the promotional ladder).  Now they are their own persons no longer dependent on whatever influences I may still have as a retired soldier.  People know them as Major Alex Nikolai Cabales and 1Lt Alex Andre Cabales, both PMA graduates and maybe future generals.  Now, they only need their personal credentials when they introduce themselves.  The level of respect and esteem that they get (from their seniors, peers and subordinates) is based on their own capabilities and potentials.  They may also receive amenities and special privileges, sometimes even better than the one’s I got when I was their age and rank, but surely these are direct rewards of their commendable performances as officers.  Sometimes though, they are asked of our relationship by some people who once worked with me.  Perhaps then that would only be the time that it may be necessary for them to say that I am their father.  This additional information, however, can no longer alter a bit the strength of their reputations as professional military officers.   

Today, we have some people who run for public position who do not have their own credentials and haven’t had the opportunity of casting their own shadows.  The funny thing is that they believe that they deserve to win because their father or mother; or even a relative or a namesake was once a great achiever!   Funnier still is that the electorate will still vote for them with nothing else to show but this “talent” of being a son, a daughter or a relative of a great man.