The soldier and the lesbian

 

An old man sat in a coffee shop wearing the same old faded camouflage jacket. Being a familiar feature, the waitress asked him whether he was a soldier. The old man replied, “Yes I was a soldier for 36 years. At 17, I was a cadet at the Philippine Military Academy. I fought in the MNLF conflict in Mindanao in the late 70’s unto the 80’s as a junior officer and later the MILF as a field commander in the late 80’s onwards. I was in the insurgency campaign in Samar, Northern Luzon, the Bicol Region and in many parts of our country. I was an instructor of the Ranger School as well. Well, I bet that makes me nothing but a soldier.” “How about you?” the old man asked the waitress in return.

“Well”, the waitress replied, “I’ve had different odd jobs before but what I am sure about is that I am a lesbian. When I wake up in the morning, I start imagining of naked women. When I take my shower, I still think of naked women and even when taking my meals I can’t help thinking about naked women. All day long I think of nothing but naked women and even in my sleep I still dream of naked women”.

The waitress left and the old man was silently sipping his coffee when a young man arrived. He saw the old man and noticed his camouflage jacket. He approached the old man and asked, “Sir, were you a soldier?” The old man replied, “I thought I was a soldier, but now I realized that in fact I was a lesbian!”